Crazy Mofo: Act 2

from by Zone Runners



DiGi: Yo doc!
halc: Yeah?
DiGi: Yo, pass me one of those Aquatic Ruin Beers from the fridge, man!
halc: Here ya go!
DiGi: Cheers, bredda!
DiGi: Yo, I've been thinking.
halc: What's up?
DiGi: We should totally hit up that club we went to.
halc: Oh yeah? Which one?
DiGi: You know the one we took the Robo to?
halc: Oh yeah, yeah. I remember.
DiGi: Yeah, that one, man. We should go back without the Robo this time! Haha!
halc: Haha haha!
DiGi: Yo, speaking of which, where is he?
halc: That's a good question, actually.
DiGi: Yo, he's left a mess over here, man. Holy shit!
halc: Oh WOAH!
DiGi: What's this puddle on the floor? Is that motor oil?
halc: No no, it... it smells like Rum.
DiGi: It's RUM?!
Both: Oh SHIT!!
halc: Oh damn it! This is not good!
DiGi: He's going to go fuck some shit up now. Why did you leave the Rum lying out, man?
halc: Man, don't blame me. I forgot to put it away.
DiGi: You know what he's like.
halc: Yeah, I know what he’s like. Shit!
DiGi: I bet he's gone back to that club without us!
halc: God, he probably has.
DiGi: I bet you he's back in that fucking club.
halc: He's probably smashing that place up and they're gonna be billing it back to us.
DiGi: Shit shit shit! No, serious. This is serious.
halc: I know. Aight, aight. I'ma call some homies in the other Zones. See if we can locate him.
DiGi: You head that way, I head this way. We gotta find this fucking Robo before he tears up the whole Zone, man.
halc: Aight, man. Let's do it.
Both: Oh Sir J, you crazy mother fucking robot you, you god damn mother fucker!!

-Verse 1-
Hello again, enemies and old friends
The Green and Orange understand that my brain is made of circuitry
So it’s hard to go slow with all this RAM
Executing Commands before you even can exclaim “damn!
Is that a one-man band?” Naw, individually floating like Space Jam
But collectively ZRN bringin the grand slam
Whether I’m dunking in the PC coolant or politically correctin’ errors and mistakes of humans
There’s no doom or gloom when I’m in the room
Buy nary a digit or dick pics to make the chick’s swoon
Never learned to swim, so I’m drowning in pussy
But don’t expect SmallTalk to make me spare a Ruby
Can’t code for shit yet I’m still Macroing groupies, laying my Pipelines in their mouths to teach em’ bout humility, Shawty screaming “UNITY! Why you no longer doin’ me like that?”

Well the fact is your GUI is askin’ for an accidentally pre-meditated ass-whoopin bitch-slappin
But once you grasp this you will not react in a time to devise an ass-kiss
That’ll ever work again to inspire me to backflip back into your Log cabin
Your ratchet-ass lies are static, and what happens in Las Vegas stays in Las Vegas Algorithms
Get the fuck off of my mattress
Get mad or sad ‘cause you think I’m spaztic
I’m out of fucks to give so I’m movin passed this
Don’t expect a monthly check to rekindle our whackass past like match sticks
Cause to me you’re just a one-night stand,
Not even worth a morning after cup of the Javascript
I’ve got more people ready for my lap, shit
Don’t you see the line, kid? Ayy, that’s a wrap, bitch

Everybody in the place tonight (get down) when you see this Robo
We didn’t bring him here to fight, now everybody copy this Crazy Mofo
Everybody in the place tonight (get down) when you see this Robo
We didn’t bring him here to fight, now everybody copy this Crazy Mofo

-Verse 2-
My modus operandi is beast, unleash this genie like yeast
Infectin every FireWall that tries to condom me
Who you think be runnin the streets of the dirty south, drive-by collard green beats
But don’t be tryin to copy, you’re better off ridin kamikaze
Tryin to calm me by cauterizing my constant dreams
But regardless of economy I’m Compiling Bitcoins 24/7 all week
Black market Grey-Hat wizardry, White Space Hyper-Threaded yawning
and I advise you to stop mocking me with these closed doors
Or object-oriented backlogging
Why should you be cautious of me? (Well) simply speaking…
(I’m sorry) (erghsuilrHooHooHooHooHooo) (Here’s Jonnnny)

Because I’m Finna shove my Trojan down your throat and double team this ho like Amy Rose
Then I strike a pose and blow my Downloads all over your Mobo like yolo
And if your Registry is offended by my libido
Just tell her “let it go,” ain’t no use tryin to Adblock this robo
All my tentacle cocks shock rock you til’ every fishy Code Smell is exposed
Slash all you average joe sapien homos in half
Then stash yo asses in separate packs of boxed ice
Archive the entire batch so deep that when Extracted
The cops scratch their heads sayin “we can’t find the path specified”
Chill in the lab askin The Doc for spare bodybags
Borrow cash from Val, call a one-way cab
Then I take out the trash, scan the junkyard for scraps
Activate my jetpack, blast away through the atmosphere

I’m in the Cloud peerin through my HUD, lock on all targets
Format like HDD’s, Chang(e) Cho into Margaret
I’m a WMD who’s been disregarded
But when I’m done wiping my ass with these BSOD’s and redrawing the maps (uncharted)
Screen-cap the Benchmarks, try to reinstall it (HA!)
But guess who’s gonna be laughin the hardest
(Ha Ha!) Yeah, that’s why I’m singing…

Everybody on the interwebz they know me as the lovely Crazy Robo
The Doctor and The Bunny better hold me down lest I unleash my inner raging Mofo


(Go J, it’s time to go Loco! Go ROBO!)
(Go, go, go! Go, go, go!)
(Go J, it’s time to go Loco! Go ROBO!)
I’m finna do these bitches like Dance Moms
And I ain’t talkin about the milfs, I’m talkin bout the little kids, HA HA!
Go J, it’s time to go Loco! Go ROBO!)
(Go, go, go! Go, go, go!)
(Go J, it’s time to go Loco! Go ROBO!)
Dick so big transformin into Megatron
Open wide, tongue out, say AAAHHHHHH



from Triple Troublemakers, released February 18, 2015



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Zone Runners Burlington, North Carolina

VGM-inspired hip hop trio comprised of halc, DiGi Valentine & Sir Jordanius.

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